Genre: Angstish, bit of drama… um… yeah
Pairing: Kinda sorta almost TezxFuji
Summary: What’s behind a smile…?
Warning: Shonen ai, Cuteness, um… a small fight, mean Fuji, mean Tez, careing Fuji, needy Tez.
His pillow was warm, and comfortable. He felt almost sheltered by it, and that steady thump he could hear… wait. The pillow was a lot firmer than usual, and if he concentrated, there was something wrapped around him, holding him. That beat? Yuuta wasn’t home so it wasn’t the bass of his stereo. With that eliminated, his brain fought sleepiness valiantly trying to figure out what was off about something that felt so warm. Hadn’t… ?
Fuji’s eyes slid open a sliver, not quite daring to open fully. He vaguely recalled the conversation that ended up with both him and Tezuka crawling into Fuji’s bed. Sure enough, he realised that the pillow he was using was indeed Tezuka’s chest, and the soothing beat had been the other boy’s heart. That, which was wrapped around his waist, was Tezuka’s arm.
Panic rose up in the shorter boy, but he quelled it, trying to get his mind to think logically. If he could just extract himself from this position before Tezuka woke up, everything would be okay. Raising himself up a little, Fuji tried to move slowly away from the other boy, but realised a little too late that he had barely any room to move with the wall as close as it was. Not to mention the fact that when he tried to move, Tezuka’s arm tightened marginally.
The position this left Fuji in wasn’t the most comfortable. Propped up so as to minimize the contact he had with the other boy, while trying to avoid the grip firming around his waist was difficult. Fuji glanced at Tezuka’s face out of the corner of his eye, wondering if his friend was really asleep.
Tezuka’s chest rose and fell in a rhythmic pattern, and for a few seconds the prodigy was tempted to just lie back down and fall asleep again. Then he remembered they had training that morning. Although it was still early enough, because Saturday training always started a little later, Fuji needed to move. He felt slightly confused, and although watching Tezuka sleep was amazingly enthralling, he didn’t particularly want to be caught doing it. The shorter boy somehow didn’t think he should be watching.
So he tried to move again. Approaching it differently this time, he attempted to slide out from under Tezuka’s arm, aiming for the bottom of the bed. The arm tightened again, and Fuji suppressed a moan as his progress was once again halted. His shirt rode up so that skin was touching skin, and Fuji was at a loss. The prodigy felt the other boy move, the arm stiffen and then relax slightly, and he knew that Tezuka had just woken up. Damn.
He looked back at the other boy, who was blinking sleepy brown eyes that still seemed to just see everything. Fuji didn’t know what to say, and only just managed to smooth his own features away from the ‘caught like a deer in headlights’ expression. He just didn’t know how Tezuka was going to react. He’d told the other boy they shouldn’t share his bed…and look what had happened. Maybe now Tezuka would listen to him…
There was a sigh, and Tezuka finally removed his arm, fingers trailing lightly against Fuji’s bared waist. He pushed himself into a sitting position, body still precariously close to the smaller boys, and just looked at Fuji for a few seconds. “Did you sleep well?” There was so much more to that question, so much hidden inside those few words.
Among the myriad of meanings in that phrase, Fuji managed a slight sigh of relief. The reaction was almost typically Tezuka. Fuji took some time to actually think over his answer, because the truth was that he had slept well…amazingly well. “Yes… I did.” He smiled at his friend.
Fuji felt himself blush slightly, suddenly feeling a little out of depth. Did Tezuka know? Or was it just that it had been obvious because of the taller boy’s arm had been wrapped around him? “Yes…surprisingly.”
Tezuka raised an eyebrow. “I’m sorry then.”
A sigh escaped Fuji again and he reached out a hand, lightly touching his friend’s shoulder for a second. That wasn’t what he’d meant. “Don’t be…” He searched for the words, pushing past the wall that was threatening to engulf him. Despite the hurdles they were overcoming, it still was far from easy for him. “Just… unexpected…”
Again Tezuka raised an eyebrow. “Ahh, ” Brown eyes locked with cerulean briefly, before breaking the gaze. Reaching out a hand, Tezuka picked up his glasses placing them back on his nose, drawing his legs into a crossed position at the same time, he focused on Fuji once more, waiting.
“You slept…?” Fuji felt an inane need to know if Tezuka had slept just as well, considering he’d been the one used as a pillow.
Tezuka smiled, and swung his legs to the side. Standing up, he turned to keep his eyes on Fuji. “Like a rock.”
Training was rather mundane. Apart from the rather amusing instance of Ryoma being roped into taking Ryuzaki’s granddaughter to do something the following day, what it was he wasn’t paying enough attention to know. In short, Fuji was rather bored.
And his mind, delighting in this fact, decided that it would be fun to keep running over that morning’s waking up… over and over again. That was until Eiji almost pounced on him at the end of training.
“Fujiko!” The redhead’s face was flushed and smiling. Tennis practice always seemed to leave the acrobatic player somewhat breathless.
“Ne, Eiji?” Fuji smiled at his friend, mildly wondering just what Tezuka had planned for the rest of the weekend.
“Let’s go get burgers, Fuji! Even Oishi is gonna come! And the kid, and Momo…although he does eat so much, but still. Can you come? Say you’ll come!” Violet eyes shone, exuberance overflowed, and the smile was infectious.
But Fuji’s eyes strayed over to Tezuka briefly, the words still ringing in his mind.
“This weekend is mine. Just you and me…”
And Fuji understood what the prize was, a small smile creasing his lips. “Rome?”
“The whole two way street…”
The captain’s face appeared expressionless, but Fuji could see a slight undercurrent of tension that spoke of Tezuka not being entirely happy about the invitation. The taller boy seemed to guard his privacy tenaciously, which gave Fuji an idea.
“Sure, Eiji. Tezuka’ll come too, won’t you, Tezuka.” Smile spread wide over his face, Fuji ignored the look that his friend was giving him. Tezuka had been the one to say that the weekend was theirs after all; it was his own fault. “It’ll be fun!”
Eiji smiled brightly. “Great, I’ll tell the others!” He dashed off to the locker rooms, oblivious to the tension between the two club members left on the court.
Fuji watched him go, smile still fixed firmly when he turned to face Tezuka. “Don’t be like that.” He chided gently, stepping a little closer and lowering his voice so that no one would have even a chance at hearing the words. “It was your idea after all…” The tone lilted, teased, and had the desired effect; Tezuka’s shoulders relaxed just that little bit.
“Weekend?” Brown eyes studied the prodigy thoughtfully.
“Still yours…” Opening his eyes a little, Fuji continued to smile, a mischievous gleam entering them. “You just have to… share.”
Tezuka continued to look at him for a few seconds, and Fuji swore that he was being looked through. The expression in those brown eyes seemed even more… irritated, and as the captain turned abruptly on his heel, muttering a: “Fine then,” over his shoulder, Fuji got the distinct impression that Tezuka didn’t like to share.
The hamburger place was full, and adding the six regulars from Seigaku didn’t do anything to improve that. Momo and Echizen seemed to be trying to outeat each other. Oishi, who was currently discussing something rather quietly with Tezuka, kept flicking his eyes over the whole group of them in a way that reminded Fuji of a guard watching over his charges. It was funny in a way, and made the prodigy chuckle.
Eiji raised an eyebrow at him, obviously wanting in on the joke, and probably slightly paranoid about the cause of the chuckle. “Share, Fuji! What’s so funny?”
“Yes, do share.” The captain’s arms were crossed, the tone cutting because it came from him.
The prodigy felt Tezuka’s gaze on him, just briefly, before it moved away again. The older boy was being difficult, very difficult. “Nothing really funny, just enjoying the company.” He smiled brightly, and even though he knew Tezuka hated that smile, Fuji felt just enough irritation to flash it extra strong in his direction.
For the rest of the afternoon, Tezuka pointedly ignored Fuji until the point that irritation didn’t even begin to describe the mood the shorter boy was in. When it came to paying for the food, Fuji’s remark was snider than he had originally intended. “Tezuka’ll pay, won’t you Tezuka?” The smile on his face belied the way he felt inside right then.
And although Tezuka paid with what could be called good grace, his entire body tensed, and Fuji knew that he’d very probably pushed a little too far.
But he didn’t care. He was annoyed, even slightly angry. Tezuka didn’t have the right to act like an idiot just because Fuji decided it would be nice to spend some time with other friends. Granted, maybe he shouldn’t have accepted for Tezuka to come along, or pretty much made Tezuka pay for the outing the taller boy had never wanted to go on, but he still didn’t have to be so…stubborn.
Fuji wasn’t quite surprised when Tezuka fell into step beside him on the way home. It seemed he was no longer being ignored. The tension between them was so thick a knife wouldn’t have been able to cut through.
They arrived at Fuji’s house, and the shorter boy let them in. Shoes were stowed and slippers replaced them, before they both looked at each other, almost glowering.
Fuji, as usual, broke the silence first. “That was uncalled for, Tezuka.”
Obstinacy flashed through the captain’s eyes. “It was appropriate.”
Syusuke’s voice rose in volume slightly, fists clenched at his sides. “You can’t just expect everyone else to fall into what you want. Sometimes you have to share! Don’t be so childish!”
Tezuka’s eyes shone with anger, and a little something more. “I am a child.” It sounded petulant, and told Fuji just how far he’d pushed the taller boy, for him to make such a statement.
All it did was serve to fuel Fuji’s annoyance. “You are? Then act like it sometimes.” He threw his hands up in the air. “Learn to have a little fun, re…”
But he was cut off as a hand grabbed one of his wrists, slamming it into the wall behind him. Tezuka’s proximity pressed him flush against the wall, and Fuji found himself winded by the impact. There was something in those brown eyes that Fuji hadn’t seen before, something that made him shiver, and he wasn’t sure it was a good thing.
“Fun?” That voice murmured, like the water dripping from stalactites. There was a hollow quality to it, as if all the feelings had been drained out. It was as intense as the way those brown eyes looked at him, showing him a part that Fuji wasn’t sure if he was ready to see or not, yet he couldn’t help but listen. “Define fun, Syusuke…”
The breath brushed against his face, and Fuji found himself closing his eyes, just for a moment. When he spoke, it was soft, almost plaintive. “Enjoy life more than you let yourself…more than you let on…” It was a plea, a wish for his friend to actually let Fuji in.
When Tezuka spoke again, the tone had softened, a slight hint of bewilderment in it. “I enjoy…things…” His grip on the wrist slackened a little, his other hand brushing strands of his own hair out of the way.
“More than just tennis…” Fuji saw something akin to pain in those brown eyes, and wanted to do something, anything to wash it away.
But then Tezuka smiled that soft, small smile, and Fuji smiled tentatively back when the taller boy spoke. “I have more…” He rested his chin against Fuji’s forehead, mumbling the rest into the shorter boy’s hair. “I enjoy you…”
Not quite knowing how to react, and feeling a little overwhelmed, Fuji tugged Tezuka closer with his free hand. Slipping that same hand around the other boy’s back, trying to lend some of the comfort that he felt Tezuka needed, point blankly ignoring the voice that told him to push the other boy away.
He wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, his perception of time felt distorted by the body clutching his own in something akin to desperation. This was a part of Tezuka he hadn’t seen before… a part that… needed him?
All he knew was that it had long since grown dark outside, and that he was starting to feel tired and a little stiff. Moving his head a little, Fuji made a decision and chuckled softly into Tezuka’s neck. “Don’t know about you, but I can’t sleep standing up…”
The taller boy drew back, the most sheepish look on his face that Fuji had ever seen. It made the prodigy’s laugh a little louder as Tezuka blinked owlishly. That smile, perhaps a little tireder this time, spread over Tezuka’s face. His voice was teasingly soft. “You cant? What sort of prodigy are you?” Even a slight laugh escaped from the captain’s throat, and Fuji chuckled with him, enjoying the sound that the older boy so rarely let out.
Disentangling themselves before moving towards the bedroom, Fuji spoke. “We should sleep. I have something… to show you tomorrow.” His voice was hesitant, still not sure if he really wanted to share that with Tezuka, but at the same time…
Tezuka stopped short, pulling the shorter boy up with him. “Just us.” It wasn’t a question; it was more like a demand.
Fuji sighed. “Mostly, just…” He held a hand up to silence Tezuka’s response. “… trust me.”
He waited a moment for Tezuka to relax and nod once in acceptance, before heading to his room. It was later than he’d thought, and yet earlier than they’d usually go to sleep, but Fuji didn’t mind. It just meant they’d have more energy for the next day. He watched Tezuka when he came back from the bathroom, noting the tired sag to the other boy’s shoulders. The decision he’d made no longer seemed difficult, it felt right, even if it made him a little nervous.
Fuji climbed into bed first, sitting up against the wall, watching the other boy thoughtfully. His mind worked overtime. Tezuka seemed to find comfort of some sort in Fuji just being there. Well, if that was the case… the prodigy smiled as Tezuka settled himself into bed.
Taking his glasses off and placing them on the side table once again, Tezuka looked up at Fuji who was still half sitting in the bed. He raised an eyebrow. “Not tired now?”
“Yes… I am.” He looked thoughtful for a moment before slipping under the blanket and raising himself on one elbow to look at Tezuka thoughtfully, convincing himself yet again that the taller boy needed what he was about to do. With an impish grin, Fuji moved to rest his head on Tezuka’s chest.
The other boy stiffened, and for a moment Fuji thought he might have misjudged his friend. At least, he did until the tension leaked out of the body underneath him and an arm snaked its way around Fuji’s waist , resting lightly. Just enough touch to be there, and not set off Fuji’s alarms. For that he was grateful.
“Comfortable?” Tezuka’s voice was lighter and softer than it had been all day.
Fuji smiled, although he knew the other boy couldn’t see it. “Expected.” Tezuka’s arm squeezed once, gently, but this time, Fuji found he didn’t mind that much.
There we go… Feedback much appreciated!
Notes: Um yes, I wrote this whilst having idiot uninvited guests over all fracking day. So I’m sorry if it disappointed anyone …